I'm getting desperate.
One dose of anti-depressant for breakfast all so I can exit from this cycle that mind keeps me trapped in.
Betrayed by my own brain.
There’s a war going on in my head and I don’t have any weapons or a position. I just know that I’m losing, and my last resort is prescription.
That’s why when you ask me what’s wrong, it’s hard for me to explain. That’s why when you tell me my life is good and I should be happy, I look at you like you’re one that's insane.
Something is off between the layers of my membrane — happiness is not something I’ve ever been able to maintain.
Low serotonin keeps me chained to my bed. But luckily, that’s the safest place I have outside of my head.
It’s spiral season again.
Where I don’t sleep or eat — just cry and think consistently and pretend I’m okay when I show up for plans that I already made and call out of work when faking it is too hard on certain days.
Chemical imbalance so my work/ life is never balanced.
There’s nothing anyone can do to make me snap out of it, so I isolate in silence.
The embarrassment of me needing assistance with regulating a mood switch. The disbelief of me needing…